What it's Really Like in Fun Brawls
by The Meloneers
Summary: Join a series of characters take on mysteries adventures and wondrous quests in the world of Super Smash Bros. Brawl's unique game where no one attacks each other, Fun Brawls! Oh yeah, and they screw everything up too.


_Hello viewers! :D Welcome to The Meloneers first Co-op Story. If you see some change in the mood or so, that means you are beginning to read someone else part. This is the first chapter in __**What It's Really Like In Fun Brawls.**__ A Super Smash Bros. Brawl fic, of what goes on during online Fun Brawls. This story may get an M rating depending on what happens later on. And here is some fine Writers that you may view as well: _Herping Derping Derpturd _(Original Default Hitler Wario)_, pokedude4321 _(Red Hat Shoes the Pikachu)_, Master Portal _(Default Ike)_, and Sir Cloud 9 Esquire _(Green Dave the Meta Knight)._

_Now Lets Begin..._

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**What It's Really Like In Fun Brawls.**

**Chapter 1: Ass Assumptions.  
**

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You know those special brawls, where all you do is throw around items, jump and duck, and run around? Where no one attacks each other? These four thought they were going to have that kind of brawl.

They did not.

"3... 2... 1... GO!" The narrator of Brawls said, as Wario, Pikachu, Meta Knight, and Ike entered Temple.

Dave the Meta Knight was the first to act. He grabbed the first item he saw and threw it up into the air. Unfortunately for Dave, that item had explosive results.

-1.

"Dave, you're such...an idiot. Do you just grab everything and launch it?" asked Shoes the Pikachu.

"Woah woah woah man. Don't go telling me how to fun brawl. I fun brawl in the way I want to fun brawl. Now stop telling me how to fun brawl before I fun brawl you in the face." replied Dave.

"Pause. You gotta say no homo. If you no the no homo then I'll think you yes homo, no homo." said Hitler Wario.

Suddenly, a smash ball appeared.

The four charged the smash ball in a race for the ultimate power, a Final Smash. The race started with Dave running and stepping on Shoes' face. Shoes then jumped up, and kicked Ike to the ground. Shoes almost had control of the smash ball, until Hitler Wario came and farted in his face, causing his eyes to bleed and him to faint. Blood was splattered all over the ground, and it looked like it was Dave and Hitler Wario in the final battle for the smash. Dave ran at Hitler Wario with his sword, but Hitler Wario sidestepped, and Dave ran right off the edge of the Temple. Hitler Wario destroyed the smash ball, and was filled with the ULTIMATE POWER.

It was too much.

When Hitler Wario-Man went to do a Super Hitler Wario Waft, the fart's power was so intense, he blasted out of the world.

So then, the smash ball was gone.

"Oh, Hitler..." Shoes said. "I thought his ass was fully functional but clearly it's still full of fumes... Shoes said as he walked across the stage, wandering upon another item that dropped. "A Crate? Hmm..." He said, dreaming about what he could do to the other players.

"Hurrrrg..." He said, barely able to lift the crate. He said, "Hey Douchebag!" Shoes throws the Crate at Dave.

"What the hell! Ow, that hurt, you douche!" Dave yelled. Just as Dave was about to charge Shoes, a figure appeared... and beat the living sh!t out of Dave.

"Wondahful!" Hitler Wario laughed, " I has my bike ready and me hopes fer some roadkill!"

Hitler Wario pulled his bike from out of nowhere, which means it came from his ass.

Ike was unlucky to be in Wario's way. "Son of a Bitch!" Ike roared.

Hitler Wario decided to do a wheelie, but he got completely unlucky when a random bomb dropped in front of him and blew him up, up, AND AWAY!

Dave the Meta Knight was completely having a spasm. He was wondering how the f*ck he broke his sword.

"Turns out you don't have a weapon" Shoes the Pikachu said.

"I still got my fists."

"Tushay."

Wario and Ike were literally slapping each other in the face, so they decided to play Rock, Paper, Scissors.

Ike won and Wario threw an ass tantrum.

He stunk up the area.

"You douche bag! Now this fricking place smells like your tush! Way to go." Ike said.

Then somehow he yelled 'Easter' when he does a jump attack. Everyone looked at him and threw Easter eggs at him.

Then Wario mooned him, and farted. Ike couldn't stand that ass.

"You stared at my big, mother f*cking ass, you pervert" Wario snapped.

Another smash ball appeared far away from the contestants. Wario was first to go for it, until it was sliced by Dave's sword, who got kicked in the face by Shoes, who got a huge sword slammed into his face. Ike was first to weaken the smash ball, then Wario did a semi-large fart and nearly destroyed the smash ball. Shoes used thunderbolt and got the smash.

Shoes was filled with the ULTIMATE POWER as he transformed into a huge ball of light, shocking light.

He was able to fly around in this huge ball, and slammed into Wario. He shat a bike.

Shoes managed to somehow make his shocking ball, more shocking. By doing this he wasted more of his ULTIMATE POWER.

Dave was trying to out fly the huge, flying ball but got unlucky and got electrocuted.

Shoes power faded away, as he transformed back to his normal self but got dizzy cause he was spinning too fast.

"I felt like Chuck Norris..." Shoes said as he fell backwards.

"Hmm... Shoes seems drunk now Bwahaha." Wario said, repeatedly squatting. Shoes then stood up and head-butted Wario square on the ass.

"Baa! The hell is wrong with you?" Wario yelled, trying to aid to his throbbing ass. He started to run off the stage and blew up as he hit the explosive barrier. "Well," He said, being revived back into the game. "that really didn't do shit."

Shoes took a sigh and began to ask Wario, "Is your ass giving you any trouble lately?"

Wario replied, "You little shit-turd! you made this happen!"

Shoes facepalmed.

Ike and Dave were confronting each other about the question Shoes asked Wario. "I've noticed his ass HAS been acting funny lately, have you?" Ike asked Dave."

"Why yes. His ass looks too slanted, maybe that's the cause of the problem with his major ability to launch so high. F*ck logic." Dave answered back.

Well Dave knew exactly what to do whenever someone's ass was got assed up. His mother had taught him when he was having major ass problems, because she was too cheap to get a doctor.

"You kick them in the balls, and whatever is troubling their ass will come out" Dave recalled his mother saying.

Dave did just that, and Wario released all that ass into Dave's face.

Dave was knocked unconscious and was immediately rushed to a paramedic. And Wario was still in posterior peril.

"We can use an assist trophy, maybe one of them will tell us why Wario is pouring his butt all over the place." Shoes said.

He grabbed an assist trophy and smashed it on the ground. Glass flew up into Ike's face, causing him to bleed. Suddenly, a mysterious assist trophy never seen before appeared. It was a bloody, disgusting, and just plain horrible to look at thing. "Oh, great pile of horrendous shit, speak to us your wisdom!" Ike said.

"Wario's ass has a demon inside it." The garbage said.

"Damn. Way to get straight to the point, bro." Dave replied.

"Yes... anyway, Wario's ass has a demon inside it because something crawled up there while he slept, which is very nasty." The garbage continued.

"So, your saying that some kind of non-ass-smelling creature literally CRAWLED up his ass?" Ike asked.

"That is correct." the garbage responded.

"So, how do we get it out of him?" Shoes suddenly asked.

"Pttf, I dont know, you guys think of some-" the garbage disappeared.

The three of them huddled up.

"How will we think of a way to get the demon out of Wario's ass while Wario is roaming around?" Ike said.

"We could feed him a kind of food that makes him shit a lot" Shoes replied.

"Damn, bro. Way to get that settled" Dave responded.

So then the gang forced some random crazy ass helping shit down Wario's mouth. He was in a lot of pain after that.  
Wario farted over and over, and screams were heard coming from his ass. But still, nothing came out. Suddenly, Wario's eyes started to glow like he was filled with the ULTIMATE POWER. But he wasn't. The demon wanted to talk.

"You...grrr...that hurt! Now you will pay!" the demon yelled.

The demon ripped Wario's ass off of his body, and things too horrible to describe appeared.

The demon fired shit-balls at the group, and Dave hit them back at him with his sword. The demon dodged it and threw a fireball at Dave. Dave was burned to a crisp. -1. Shoes charged at the demon and electrocuted him, but the demon was barely injured. The demon grabbed Shoes and threw him where Wario's ass used to be. It was a VERY unpleasant trip for both Shoes and Wario.

Then it was Ike's turn. Ike managed to do some damage to the demon by cutting his arm, but then the demon grabbed him and smashed him on the ground. "There's just no way that we can win, this guy's an evil beast. He brawls too well because he's not a mortal man." Ike said.

"Goddammit Ike! Stop bringing everyone down!" yelled Dave. Dave charged at the demon, and the demon proceeded to beat his ass.

So then Ike got up and swung the sword on the demon and then Wario mooned him with the small remaining bit of his ass and  
Dave shoved a Pokéball up the demon's ass.

Meowth came out of it and then it bit him hard in the ass. "Take that, you douche bag!" Meowth said.

The demon then found water and drowned himself because he had no choice. After that, Wario's ass proceded to regenerate.

"That's what you get for trying to whoop our ass!" everyone said.

Wario still had something up his ass, Shoes.

"GAH! LET ME OUT DAMMIT! ITS DARK IN HERE! Hey, I found your bike keys!" Shoes screamed from within an ass.

"So, THATS where those stupid keys went, I've been looking for ages!" Wario said.

Wario then had to super-fart Shoes out, it was an unpleasant sight.

"So, Dave" Ike began, "Why is your name Dave, Dave?"

"That is none of your concern, the thing is we saved someone's ass, from a suicidal demon!" Dave replied, then he cut Ike.

"That demon was a complete unnatural sight of life, NO ONE can live inside Wario 's ass for THAT amount of time!"

Shoes was unconscious.

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_Thar you has it, folks! :D The Meloneers first chapter of a story is completed! It goes through a check four times, by 4 people, the first and second has already been done. Anyway hope you liked our little Co-op story, and we hope you stay tuned to find more comedy and stay tuned for a new residence in The Meloneers family, Vex! (He will be in the next story we make, not this one.)  
_

_-PokeDuDe4321  
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_-HerpingDerpingDerpturd  
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_-Sir Cloud9 Esquire  
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_-Master Portal  
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_Bai~  
_


End file.
